The fam will be here tomorrow

Ryan's family is visiting us in San Antonio?

This is a first. Must. Clean. So. Badly. Is it wrong to just throw everything in the spare room and close the door? Well if its wrong, do I care? Umm No.

We've had a particularly bad week so I hope the visit goes well. I am not feeling social and I have some kind of bizarre-ass breakout on my face next to my lip. Its healing but its gross.

Yeah I'm gross. Do I care? Ummm Yes.

So in other news, what is a semi-used kidney going for on the black market these days? Does anyone want my eggs? I'm a smarty and kind of cute except for those pesky obesity genes. Really though, seriously. Any buyers? If you want a future pessimistic sarcastic doctor, lawyer, physicist or the like, consider my eggs! I'll give you a great deal - 2 for 1 sale.

Will trade eggs for corneas?

Will trade eggs for maid services?

Will trade eggs for a nice vacation?

I'll give you an entire ovary if you will give me a high-paying guaranteed for life job that I love. Ok both ovaries. Please?